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myleskFor the second time in two weeks, for the fifth time since 2025 began, I've been notified of LiveJournal activity.
First scalarparty "posted entry for the first time in a while", and then there was a lengthy catch-up from lilrongal.
Are people slowly abandoning the Zuckerberg platform and returning to where parasocial relationships really began (for me at least)?
I posted four entries in The Ephemeral Tourist/Nikka Emphemera after February 24,2022. I couldn't just get away clean after Russian troops escalated the invasion of Ukraine. Although Six Apart/LiveJournal was sold to a Russian media company in 2007, it wasn't until the war started and the email notices came out that LiveJournal would be governed by the laws of the Federal Republic of Russia that I started to get fidgety. Then the troll farms made the news, Cambridge Analyctica, election interference, the war; it doesn't feel like friendly territory over there.
But I have paid a price for not writing. The Myles-shaped hole in the world started to get smaller at the same time I stopped writing. The voices in my head started to get unruly, often chaotic, without the structure of long-form stories to keep them organized. The characters changed. Time began to evaporate. Memory ground down leaving a vacuum like the unstructured dreamspace in Christopher Nolan's Inception that was filled with a silent rage that I was ~ that I am still ~ unable to really manage.
People live in my mind rent-free. Or perhaps better said, parts of people, incomplete imaginary models of people, live in my mind and comment on almost everything I say or don't say or do or don't do. And I react emotionally to it all of it as though it is all really happening. The emotion affects my behaviour, and my behaviour determines the edges of the Myles-shaped hole in the world.
It feels very small.
First scalarparty "posted entry for the first time in a while", and then there was a lengthy catch-up from lilrongal.
Are people slowly abandoning the Zuckerberg platform and returning to where parasocial relationships really began (for me at least)?
I posted four entries in The Ephemeral Tourist/Nikka Emphemera after February 24,2022. I couldn't just get away clean after Russian troops escalated the invasion of Ukraine. Although Six Apart/LiveJournal was sold to a Russian media company in 2007, it wasn't until the war started and the email notices came out that LiveJournal would be governed by the laws of the Federal Republic of Russia that I started to get fidgety. Then the troll farms made the news, Cambridge Analyctica, election interference, the war; it doesn't feel like friendly territory over there.
But I have paid a price for not writing. The Myles-shaped hole in the world started to get smaller at the same time I stopped writing. The voices in my head started to get unruly, often chaotic, without the structure of long-form stories to keep them organized. The characters changed. Time began to evaporate. Memory ground down leaving a vacuum like the unstructured dreamspace in Christopher Nolan's Inception that was filled with a silent rage that I was ~ that I am still ~ unable to really manage.
People live in my mind rent-free. Or perhaps better said, parts of people, incomplete imaginary models of people, live in my mind and comment on almost everything I say or don't say or do or don't do. And I react emotionally to it all of it as though it is all really happening. The emotion affects my behaviour, and my behaviour determines the edges of the Myles-shaped hole in the world.
It feels very small.
